This isn’t about dreams of you know the future or successes. Like I dream of retiring here or there, or investing, or dreams for my kid or grand kids, or dreams of a big career. No. this is about those nightly visions that bubble up and reveal our psyche.
My favorite recurring dream has been flying dreams. Not on a plane, because I have had those, but they are always nightmares. One was about crashing, and I could feel my panic and the dread in the dream of I can’t believe this is how I am going to die. I woke up panicked but relieved.
The flying dream is my being able to fly. No capes or flapping arms, just taking off and soaring wherever I want. The most recent was months ago, and I was like this combination of Katniss with a bow and arrow but could fly. Yeah that was cool. Mostly, they are just the feeling of soaring and freedom.
The first dreams I had about my dad and grandma after they died, and I heard their voices, I woke up crying. Their presence was so powerful in the dream and then to wake up and know all over again they were gone. Vivid. Painful.
I must say the weirdest dream that I had was about Robin Williams. It was at the end of the year 2014 or later, but I remember because it was also the same year we had gone to Israel.
So the dream starts with a an underground cavern, but there is plenty of light because above this cavern is a view of the outside world. (Think of The Allegory of the Cave type of thing. )
Williams is there and asks me I would like a tour of his space. It is just a cavern with rocks and nooks and crannies. He shows me his artwork on the cavern walls and then shows me his thinking place and how he likes to sit and rest his forehead. In this small corner, are several small drawings. (I have no memory of what any of the actual drawing were). He tells me sit and shows me how to rest my forehead so I can see the drawings better.
I thank him for showing me everything, but that I have to go and meet my friend who is just out through the opening above the cavern. He says thanks for taking the time to look. I told him he could leave as well if he wanted. He said no. He was fine where he was, and he really couldn’t go.
I stepped out of the cavern and onto a busy street. It was hard to notice the underground space I had come up from unless someone was really looking. I was trying to cross the busy street when the dream just stops. In the dream, he never cracked a joke. Always had his hands in his pockets.
So strange what dreams stick with us. I sometimes have repeat dreams like with flying, my dad and grandmother, and even bad dreams of my teeth falling. I have never had the repeat dream of Williams, but every time that I see picture of him, I see him standing in the middle of a vast cavern waiting for someone else to come along through so he can show them around.